Gordon Talks Dirty


I’m gonna give you some pointers for the big night! So if you’re feeling adventurous, follow this! You need a really nice robust tart.
What we’re looking for is a really nice broad. The most popular bird in the country.
Flexible body. Semi-firm breasts, but quite bouncy.. and then just lift-up the skirt and they get excitied, so they look wet.
Open up… …the legs.
Two beautiful thighs. Three fingers. Get your hand,
and almost treat your hand like a sort of whisk. Push your fingers in there and it’s nice and moist
and smelling very fragrant, and that confirms she’s ready for up-and-down motion. That’s not rocket science, is it? That’s common sense! DO NOT be scared about the bottom. DON’T WORRY!
(Uh-hee-hee-heeeeeee) That’s classed as the dark brown,
Rolls-Royce part. It’s full of flavour,
so treat it with some respect. And get REALLY nice and comfortable. And then turn her over…. and bang
up THE BUTT.
(mmmmmmmmmm) And this is where you need… …a small knob.
Imagine you’re holding a tennis racket or a little whisk and then… A confident grip, firm… push push, push, push.
Straight in the butt crack! And get it in there! and just up and down… ….up and down.
It feels and sounds a little bit weird. and it’s SO easy to cream
in literally minutes. Now, the secret now… is to make sure that we DEFINITELY don’t go for a pee.
(Mmmmm) Hold back, and WAIT. Mm… mmmm.. mmmmm.. mmmmmmm..
mmmmmmmm… MMMMMMMMM…. and then bang… OUT!
Bang, it pops out. begin to recycle the bottles and just drip a nice white, creamy liquid
down the bottom to give it some form of decoration just, almost like a little tap and just let it drizzle out.
Now don’t toucn your face,
especially your eyes. It smells like FISH It’s strong, it’s slightly sour, but it’s creamy
and it’s packed with folks in Greece. That SMELLS AMAZING!
THAT SMELLS… amazing.

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